Thursday, March 10, 2011

"But how do I feel this good sober?" P!nk

Note to self: Always view blog post before publishing :)

"The power of faith in the now moment is what allows us to embrace the uncertainty of the now, and to embrace it with non-resistance that allows for pain to coexist with joy. We can do this because we recognize that discomfort is always an opportunity to evolve something." Spotted Eagle

This last week or so with all the things I was experiencing, life did not stop. There was still so much joy intertwined with the sobering truths I was facing. The word sober is interesting. In our culture it is generally related to being free from drugs and alcohol. I have thought about this word a lot in the past week.

not intoxicated or drunk.
habitually temperate, especially in the use of liquor.
quiet or sedate in demeanor, as persons.
marked by seriousness, gravity, solemnity, etc., as of demeanor, speech, etc.: a sober occasion.
subdued in tone, as color; not gay or showy, as clothes.
free from excess, extravagance, or exaggeration: sober facts.
showing self-control: sober restraint.
sane or rational: a sober solution to the problem.

Definition 2 refers to temperate.

1350–1400; Middle English temperat < Latin temperātus, past participle of temperāre to exercise restraint, control

I had pondered the words above for a couple days when I received an unexpected phone call. The person calling I have not spoken to for some time. She called to let me know that some one important to me that has had lifelong issues with drugs and alcohol had now been sober for 52 days. She then went on to tell me about her own struggles with addictive behavior. It was a refreshing, eye opening, totally authentic exchange. I left that phone call with so much new knowledge about what it means to be human and what it takes to walk away from the things that hold us back from lives of joy and authenticity.

I believe that almost everyone has some sort of addiction to something. I know for me the only way to walk away from the things that rob me of essence is to be sober and temperate. Not the sober and temperate involving alcohol, but sober and temperate in using my unique make-up to make the decisions that are best for me, no matter what the consequences. A moment to moment connection with what is intangible and forever and therefore most real.

At the same time, sober and temperate do not mean devoid of laughing and happiness as so many in our culture believe. They mean finding happiness that is real. It means finding humor wherever you find it, for some of us that is almost everywhere. Sober and temperate mean knowing where the middle road is and constantly returning to your connection to spirit, especially when circumstances are pulling you from that connection.


  1. Sounds familiar. I'm currently writing a post that is intertwined somewhat with this.

    I can definitely take these words of yours, "This last week or so with all the things I was experiencing, life did not stop. There was still so much joy intertwined with the sobering truths I was facing." and apply them directly to my own life this week.

    Looking forward to seeing you guys on saturday. Wanting to call you:)

  2. I haven't had time to read your post yet Julie but I will :) I am looking forward to seeing you guys too.